The future is scary

The future is scary, but you can't just run back to the past because it's familiar. Yes it's tempting, but it's a mistake.

-How I Met Your Mother Season 6, Episode 24-

Sometimes I doubted myself

Sometimes I doubted myself whether I've been a good bf in my previous relationships.  Did I become a better man?  Have I dote, spoil and pamper my gf enough?

I don't know the answer to that.

When a guy initially meet a girl that he likes, he will try to shower her with love, care and attention.  For a guy who had gone through disappointment in past experiences, he will reserve that remaining 10% or 20% of extra doting, spoiling and pampering because he is not sure whether the girl will be like the others before her, will take his love for granted.

And here comes the dilemma.  The girl will not agree to accept the boy until she sees the 100% of the guy.  She wants to be sure before getting herself hurt again as well.

This is has become a never ending kind of game.  I don't think there is a best solution to such dilemma.  But I believe if both can have a little faith and trust in each other, to march a step towards each other and open up at least there is a chance for things to change.

Isn't this is what it's all about being in a relationship?  We learn about each other the most when we get comfortable and show our love one our true self.  We learn about his/her flaws and we embrace him/her with love. Afterall, his/her imperfections are the things that make him/her perfect and the one and only unique person in our heart.

Anyway, I don't know where this random thoughts are going... No start, no content and no ending... I am in random mode I suppose.

When all are said and done...

frustration became disappointment,
disappointment became anger,
anger became despair,
despair became depressed,
depressed became...

"I don't give a damn anymore!"

Dreams

Now here you go again, you say you want your freedom
Well who am I to keep you down
It's only right that you should play the way you feel it
But listen carefully to the sound
Of your loneliness

Like a heartbeat drives you mad
In the stillness of remembering
And what you had
And what you lost
And what you had
And what you lost

Yeah, thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
Yeah, women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know, you'll know

Now here I go again, I see the crystal visions
I keep my visions to myself
It's only me who wants to wrap around your dreams and
Have you any dreams you'd like to sell

Dreams of loneliness...
Like a heartbeat drives you mad
In the stillnes of remembering
And what you had
And what you lost
And what you had
And what you lost

Yeah, thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
Yeah, women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know, you'll know

Yeah, thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
Yeah, women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know, you'll know

Yeah, thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
Yeah, women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know, you'll know

You will know, you will know, oh, you will know...

What we don't bring, We can't take away

All of us were born and brought to this world with nothing.  Not clothings, not money and not jewelery.  We don't owe anyone anything and no one owes us anything either.  Life was as pure as a piece of blank paper.

As time past, people start to shower us with love, wonderful compliments that made our days and most importantly cares.  We think to ourselves, we deserves all these, because everyone needs to be loved, complimented and cared for.

But then when we are showered with hatred, slandering and heart breaking words, we feel that people are treating us unfairly, being mean and does not care about our feelings.

We all know how to complain when we are mistreated.  But do we know how cherish and appreciate when we are being treated the way we want to be?  We are born into this world with no debt... no one owe us anything. Well maybe except for our parents who kind of have to be responsible for bringing us to this world, hehe.

Remember when we leave this world, the only thing that we can leave behind is our legacy.  And that legacy is going to be something that leaves a deep meaningful impact in someone's life. But we will have to choose whether the things what we want people to remember us by will be something that affect their life in the most positive aspect or the other way round.  It's something that we can only leave behind and cannot take away when we leave.

So, let's go out there and make a difference in other's life. Be it your decade long enemies, your loving parents or someone you love.  Cherish and appreciate not only on bad times but also during good times.

Imagine

I dedicate this to everyone who has lost direction about what life really is.  Try to think beyond the material stuff.  Try to think beyond your anger.  Try to think, whether the petty stuff that you are unhappy about is even worth getting upset about.